New York, NY-- In Union Square station citizens are becomming irate because their bags and packages are being examined and checked. Robert Vlict, pictured here, was a very thorough examiner, but he wasn't a cop. He only dressed like one. "He was an excellent bag checker, every inch was examined" says officer Ralph Yume," And he didn't mind working weekends or the night shift. He would argue with the women as his hands felt their way through their bags. He especially liked fucking with the bull dyke lesbians, threating to 'throw them in the fucking can', if they didn't fucking shut the fuck up." After some officers questioned his overly optimistic, upbeat manner and popularity an investigation was started. The NYPD found whole bags of girls panties, clothing, and other female items including the "Mr. Potatohead" doll (pictured here) in Mr. Vlict's apartment. " He said that Al Qaeda would try to bomb the subway with cute items, such as a Mr. Potatohead. We guessed it made sense at the time, no one would be looking for a potatohead bomb, Robert (vlict) is that good."
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