New York, NY-- Tragedy struck Michael Moore today requiring sedation and a stay at an area hospital. Mr. Moore 'lost' an artifact up his ass. Details are still sketchy but we know a team of cave divers had been called in from florida to retrieve the 'artifact'. "We don't know how it got up there, something about a slippery floor." said Dennis Hochen, chief diver, "My team was in there for almost an hour and the environment was just too hostile to get anything accomplished. When we almost lost one of my crew, I called the whole thing off- everyone out! I only lost my Rolex in there..thank god!"
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