Overland Park, KS-- Two University of Kansas students, Chad Moore,19, and Ted Adams,20, for a science project hypothesized, "How much weed must be smoked until Rosie O'Donnell becomes fuckable?" Something scientists and poets have wondered but none brave enough to even attempt. At no time were the two students in danger of actually having intercourse with Ms. O'Donnell. "That would have been a disaster" says, Dr. Albert Brunner, a member of the KU faculty, chosen by Mr. Adams and Mr. Moore to assist in their study.
With clipboard in hand Dr. Brunner was making notes and observations as the two students began to puff away. There were juices, Pibb, frozen peanut butter cups, Ben & Jerry's of assorted flavors and Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pies on hand to keep up their strength. After two hours of smoking and several rounds of Super Mario Go Kart, neither were open to the idea to 'being' with Ms. O'Donnell. So they slogged onward. After another two hours and a new screen with fresh water, the playstation controls no longer made any sense. "Fucking no way-man" was Mr. Adam's reply to the 'question'. "I couldn't ask Chad (moore) because he passed out on the couch, surrounded by a nest of Nestle' Peanut Butter Cup wrappers", says Dr. Brunner, "This question may never be answered. I'm sure Issac Newton had similiar dilemmas".
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